It has been some time since my last blog post, but as y’all know I was in graduate school and those summer courses kept me busy! Well, good news… ya girl is DONE! Three long years of pursuing a Master’s in Social Work and I am finally done. I remember putting class of 2020 on my vision boards and on anything really since I got accepted into graduate school. It does not feel that the time went fast, it actually felt like it took three years, haha. But, I am progressing forward with my ultimate goal which is to become a Licensed Social Worker and then Licensed Clinical Social Worker. I know all of this sounds good and you may be looking at the title like, “so what about post-grad blues” – i’m getting to that now.
During my graduate career, I remained a full-time employee. It was a lot juggling full-time work, part-time school and field placements. I felt like I had three jobs – I guess I did huh? Because I was doing something every day of the week, I mean everyday, Monday-Sunday I got used to being busy. Now that school is over, I started to experience anxiety and depression. I was anxious about what’s next for my life. I was so used to knowing what was next during those three years because I was following a grid to degree completion. Now, there isn’t any grid to follow, it’s all me now. While that sounds and feels freeing, I started feeling down about not having a structured plan for when I was done.
Now, I have been working on my coaching and consulting business which will launch on September 1, so I have been keeping myself busy with that; however, I do not know right now how busy it will actually keep me, you know? Yes, I am being positive and speaking that it will be successful but I can honestly say that I don’t really know at this moment. With that being said, I caught myself everyday this week sitting on my couch after work and zoning out. I felt a bit numb and just not here. A lot of that was me being in deep thought about what my life will look like now that I really only have one job to worry about and my business, and the rest was just filled so much uncertainty.
I learned a lot during each day I sat on the couch feeling the highs and lows of my accomplishment. One, I learned that I do not know how to not be busy. Two, I don’t celebrate myself enough. Three, I place my value in working hard and juggling multiple of things. None of this makes me happy, its actually unhealthy. I am now working on how to put a stop to these things so I can really enjoy life and find value in just being alive. It’s so much going on in the world that I want to just be happy to be alive. I am unsure how long these blues will last, but with the right support I know I will be able to overcome.
So what about you? Have you experienced post-grad blues? Let me know about your experience in the comments below.